A moment of what...?

Ok tonight I was to sleep in early but got sidetracked as I turn off this machine of mine. I saw a nickname I have not seen in a little over a year. Perhaps 2 years or so. Needless to say it was not someone I'd ever catch on-line again. So I msged them. The response was expected but the following conversation will keep my will strong for I was able to correct a wrong in my past. I clear up my whole past with just one chat with this person. It's a long story involving a prior job and many odd runins with this person. Although my thoughts are now pressed behind me I can't help wonder "what if". As my mind reels in utted stupification I find myself more at peace with were I'm at now. Dreams are the reality in which I thrive and my mind set high in the heavens. I know no bounds upon which to place myself, but am held in place by the love that's easy to see.

As my troubled mind settled down through the conversation I noticed memories of that horrid day I spent upon the phone spilling evil words within thier ear of my hatred for myself and Tina. I complain to myself as the "what if"s stroll by like sign on a barren highway in my mind. I left the chat on a pleasing thought of a friend raised form the depths of my dispair and forgiveness was blessed upon my screen in a simple. "It's ok, I know the feeling of an unhappy heart and soul."

Word of the Day: Confused, but why?

I'm looking foward to the new JOB on thursday. Being back in a lab will be sweeter than I can remember it. I've plans now to further life as a whole. And decided to focus on training myself to rush headlong into the faceing issues at hand. I've been alone, mentaly at least, throughout most of my plans. I can thank very few people for pushing me, or rather kicking my ass into doing something that had to be done. I'm hopeing to catch some rest soon as my mind stops spinning in la la land and my heart slows down from the freightened beats it's placed within me.

Gaming:
The simple pleasure of this leisure activity has gotten me again into some odd thoughts. Perhaps my life as a gamer is drawing to a close as work and school shall reign supreme in life for a while to come. I'll find time to sqeeze into some on-line death time though. I can't deny the soothing feeling I get as I play. My meditation and self medication. Frag you all suckas!